She Bangs!

A question to those who have been to Bangkok: did you ever wonder why a lot of places here start w/ a "Bang"? For those who have only heard of Bangkok, know now there are tons of Bang's in the city.


The other night, our guest Mohsin couldn't remember the entire name of a district where he was going to attend a wedding of his Thai friend. He showed me an address and it read Bang Khun Prom. Oooh, that's far!

Before Mohsin, we had four fab girls from the States. One night, they dragged my husband w/ them to see pussy shows at Patpong.

On top of some of the wackiest sex shows in the city's main red-light district, Patpong is also good for counterfeit enthusiasts. What are you thinking of? Rolex, Tag Heuer, Casio, Louis Vitton, Chanel, Prada, Ray Ban. Anything you wish for! But too bad, we human beings haven't figured out how to copy a Rolls Royce or Lamborghini yet.

Before I digress any further, let me just state that Patpong and all its unsavory offerings (or savory, depending on your point of view) are under the jurisdiction of Bang Rak District. "Rak" means love. So, back in the day, this area must have been crammed w/ love trees. Pls don't ask me what it looks like 'cause I was apparently born way too late. Now, move on to another district also w/ a Bang.

The last stop of our underground MRT is 'Bang Sue." Oooh, why would you bang someone and then sue them? Is that level of dissatisfaction even fathomable? Ok, "Sue" means honesty or naivety in the Thai language. Whatever that means in this case! The district could have been the neighborhood of honest or naïve people to acquire such a title. Or, perhaps there's a tree or creature called "Sue" too?

Anyway, let's emerge from the subway and fly in the sky w/ the city's BTS skytrain. The up and coming extension to be in service next August will pass two areas w/ a Bang – Bang Chak and Bang Na. I'm not sure what's worth seeing in Bang Chak but you might wanna check out BITEC Bang Na, a huge exhibition hall notorious for its motor shows held quite often throughout the year. You know, apart from the cars, you also get skimpily-clad girls who might make you appreciate the vehicles more (which might not be the case in the first place.)

Get off the skytrain at Saphan Taksin Station and venture out on a boat to an older part of the city, Bangkok Noi (small Bangkok) and Bangkok Yai (big Bangkok.) What you will get here is mostly cultural stuff – the Chao Phraya River, canals, palaces, a train station w/ long history, villages specializing in various craftsmanship, the Thai Royal Navy base, and of course temples after temples. Want a famous one? Sure – Temple of Dawn or Wat Arun.

Contrary to a popular belief, Bangkok is indeed on the sea – the Gulf of Thailand. But only one district (out of 50) can claim this title and it is called Bang Khun Thian.

In summary, the city is subdivided by 50 districts, 12 of which starts w/ a Bang for the name. We all know what Bang as a verb in English means and what type of pleasure it can lead to. In the Thai language, the noun form is used to refer to a village or settlement situated on a river or canal. Once upon a time, Bangkok used to be a small trading center and port community on the west bank of the Chao Phraya River. Now, you wanna know what "Kok' means?

On its own, it isn't a word yet, but possibly comes from "Ma-kok' which means olive. So, the once small town of Bangkok may have been abundant in olive orchards or traded olive as her main product.

Whatever she used to be or do, Bangkok now is a city that bangs. Here, you should easily get what you want, depending on how you look at it. She bangs you. You bang her. Or, you bang each other.

Joe

Thai Mentality: You’re in my way. Move!

I sort of defend Thai-style easy-goingness on my post dated Aug 23, 08, but for this one, forget it.

In my humblest opinion, easy-goingness is actually the way to go for many matters. A dear friend broke your vintage vase by mistake. Your hot blind date stood you up. An old man next door thunderously clears his throat a few times every day. Thousands of matters don’t really matter actually.

But not each and every! For example, some people seem to be far too laid back/care-free to the point of becoming inconsiderate.

When in Bangkok, you will surely be out and about on her rail-based transportation. Going to Suanlum Night Bazaar? Take the underground MRT and get off at the Lumpini Station. Viewing cozy condos on Langsuan Street? Use the elevated BTS and leave at Chidlom. Seems a like a piece of cake, doesn’t it?

Totally.

Still, some people – some Thai people, if they need naming – can give you a hard time.

“Please let passengers exit first.” This is what you will hear. It’s in crystal clear English, American-accented, along w/ the articulate Thai version that comes before. So, there’s no excuse for some local people to ignore this civilized request.

Besides, every station provides all the signs that you need so that you know where to stand when a train door opens to allow other passengers to exit first.

One of these days, I will write the nicest letter to the operating companies suggesting that the BTS guards could do more than whistling, and the MRT platform personnel more than just standing by in case a passenger faints??

It would be nice if the staff was also responsible for politely asking stray people to give way. Until that happens, you and I might need to remind them not to be in other people’s way. Not that we’re in a big rush or trying to locate our lost buffalo or anything. It’s just a matter of principle, right?

I don’t endorse confrontation here or anywhere else and I’m sure it’s not your intention either. Just smile and suggest w/ a friendly motion that they should move aside. Be careful not to touch or push anyone, an action that comes across as very unfriendly. While violence begets violence, I maintain that friendliness encourages cooperation. Let’s do that.

Let’s also celebrate the laid-back, care-free character in Thai people in general but not on this one.

Joe

Airport Rail Link, what else will be linked as well?

A lot of people have patiently been waiting for the rail link connecting our new airport - Suvarnnabhumi - to the city of Bangkok to finish. It is not a big surprise that this mega project has sufferred delay after delay. Isn't it always the case w/ every other big project in this country?

Anyway, looks like the dream-come-true day is near, as we can see the construction is well approaching completion.

Without a doubt, tourists will greatly benefit from this fast train. The flat-fee fare is said to be 150 Baht (around 4.5 US dollars or 3 Euros.) Good ol' meter taxis cost around 400-500 Baht including toll way.

What else will be linked as well?

Well, while one train will not stop until it reaches the airpot or the city, the other will be allowing ordinary people to up- and unloading themselves along the way. There will be six stations in total, and thousands of Bangkokians will have a new, upgraded way to commute. Then, we will see changes and new additions on the streets and malls of Bangkok.

I still remember vividly when the subway was opened some 4 years ago. I remember being surprised seeing on a train how many provincial-looking people the capital apparently harbored (call me a snob, if you will, but I insist I'm observant.)

It was such a far cry from the metropolitan passengers on the skytrains that had been in use for about 4-5 years already.

The subway that was once opening up a less polished part of Bangkok is now helping expand what is considered cool sections of the city. Appearance-wise underground commuters are catching up w/ those on the elevated trains. No kidding!

The airport rail link (28-kilometer or 17.4 mile long) will have impact the way the BTS skytrain and the MRT subway have. For one thing, you will never be deprived of beauty product ads and commercials whichever direction you're taking. Especially skin whitening cream!

A European friend of mine once said Bangkok people have a lot of attitudes even though the city is not that great. Well, great or not quite, be prepared for more people like that, my friend, 'cause after all.....you are what you ride, right?

Especially when what you ride is infested w/ what 'should" make you look right!

Kiss,
Boy de Bangkok