The other night, our guest Mohsin couldn't remember the entire name of a district where he was going to attend a wedding of his Thai friend. He showed me an address and it read Bang Khun Prom. Oooh, that's far!
Before Mohsin, we had four fab girls from the States. One night, they dragged my husband w/ them to see pussy shows at Patpong.
On top of some of the wackiest sex shows in the city's main red-light district, Patpong is also good for counterfeit enthusiasts. What are you thinking of? Rolex, Tag Heuer, Casio, Louis Vitton, Chanel, Prada, Ray Ban. Anything you wish for! But too bad, we human beings haven't figured out how to copy a Rolls Royce or Lamborghini yet.
Before I digress any further, let me just state that Patpong and all its unsavory offerings (or savory, depending on your point of view) are under the jurisdiction of Bang Rak District. "Rak" means love. So, back in the day, this area must have been crammed w/ love trees. Pls don't ask me what it looks like 'cause I was apparently born way too late. Now, move on to another district also w/ a Bang.
The last stop of our underground MRT is 'Bang Sue." Oooh, why would you bang someone and then sue them? Is that level of dissatisfaction even fathomable? Ok, "Sue" means honesty or naivety in the Thai language. Whatever that means in this case! The district could have been the neighborhood of honest or naïve people to acquire such a title. Or, perhaps there's a tree or creature called "Sue" too?
Anyway, let's emerge from the subway and fly in the sky w/ the city's BTS skytrain. The up and coming extension to be in service next August will pass two areas w/ a Bang – Bang Chak and Bang Na. I'm not sure what's worth seeing in Bang Chak but you might wanna check out BITEC Bang Na, a huge exhibition hall notorious for its motor shows held quite often throughout the year. You know, apart from the cars, you also get skimpily-clad girls who might make you appreciate the vehicles more (which might not be the case in the first place.)
Get off the skytrain at Saphan Taksin Station and venture out on a boat to an older part of the city, Bangkok Noi (small Bangkok) and Bangkok Yai (big Bangkok.) What you will get here is mostly cultural stuff – the Chao Phraya River, canals, palaces, a train station w/ long history, villages specializing in various craftsmanship, the Thai Royal Navy base, and of course temples after temples. Want a famous one? Sure – Temple of Dawn or Wat Arun.
Contrary to a popular belief, Bangkok is indeed on the sea – the Gulf of Thailand. But only one district (out of 50) can claim this title and it is called Bang Khun Thian.
In summary, the city is subdivided by 50 districts, 12 of which starts w/ a Bang for the name. We all know what Bang as a verb in English means and what type of pleasure it can lead to. In the Thai language, the noun form is used to refer to a village or settlement situated on a river or canal. Once upon a time, Bangkok used to be a small trading center and port community on the west bank of the Chao Phraya River. Now, you wanna know what "Kok' means?
On its own, it isn't a word yet, but possibly comes from "Ma-kok' which means olive. So, the once small town of Bangkok may have been abundant in olive orchards or traded olive as her main product.
Whatever she used to be or do, Bangkok now is a city that bangs. Here, you should easily get what you want, depending on how you look at it. She bangs you. You bang her. Or, you bang each other.
Joe
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