Ain’t No Big Deal

When you see a beautiful girl in Thailand, don’t believe your eyes just yet.

Why?

I’ll tell you why.

Thailand has been and will always be a Buddhist country. Imported from Sri Lanka centuries ago, Buddhism has proven to be long lasting.

We learn Buddhism from Day 1. Little school kids are “encouraged” to learn The 5 Precepts by heart. Bigger kids have to be familiar w/ biography of every important historical figure - the Prince Siddhartha and his contemporaries. But, everyone gets to mediate for a few minutes before the class starts.

I was one of those kids and I don’t recall meditating. All we wanted was for the teacher to say “Now, you can open your eyes.” Next followed the preaching and we knew that the class’s end was looming. Then what?

Volleyball time.

I must admit that I’ve 'returned' all the lectures and details to my teachers and I’m certain most people my age have done the very same thing. Who cares? No more excruciating examinations.

But a few things do remain.

Looking back, I realize there’s one thing missing from those religious sessions. One thing that’s never discussed. One thing that’s all up to you to form your own take on.

Same-gender attraction!

There’s no condemnation on a guy who happens to be attracted to a mustache, or muscled pair of arms, or a hairy chest, or the masculine loin of another guy. Likewise, no text book has any take on dykes.

So now, what is the Thai public left w/?

Our own subconscious interpretation.

Luckily, as I see it, we see that everyone is the way they are because of what they did in the past lives. Everyone has their own karma to enjoy AND deal w/, male or female or otherwise. And of course, Nirvana is accessible to anyone who perseveres. So, what’s the implication of all this?

Yes, he is straight. He’s what people call a real man. But, at the end of the day, does it really matter when he’s late at work all the time while his gay colleague is more efficient?

I myself heard a taxi driver say that he wished his son was gay bacause he didn't like how a bad boy would think it's cool not to pay attentin to classes.

Pls don't get me wrong. I'm not suggesting that gay men achieve more. We see gay people who just waste the air and space in our society as well.

I’d also say it’s not ideal for most parents to have a homosexual child because of that 'continuing the family name' thing. But what people here would say or do when that happens is “Well, so what else can we do? He probably won't get married. He doesn’t seem to like girls. Let’s just raise him to be a decent person then.”

And it turns out that….that unspoken permission has encouraged a lot of gay boys in extreme numbers!.

About the girl in the photo, no no, she’s not a dyke. She’s a man, or used to be a boy, or, whatever!

Cheerful Joe

Don't worry. Be happy!

I think that the phrase that best defines Thailand to me is ‘mai pen rai’. It’s the first few words in Thai that I learned when visiting the Land of Smiles 15 years ago. It translates roughly as ‘don’t worry’, ‘it’s not important’, ‘don’t mention it’. The truth be told, this attitude bothers me at times.

I believe there are times when people should be held accountable for their bad conduct. Mai pen rai just doesn’t cut it when a person’s action has a major negative effective on a person or a community. And yet, Thai people will go to lengths to explain to me the law of Karma. I know that Karma will eventually catch all of us, there is no escaping this most powerful law of the universe. And as much as I wholeheartedly accept that, there are times I want to short circuit Karma and have the culprit pay now, in this lifetime, not the next. Now! Dammit.

And there are times when the beauty of ‘mai pen rai’ soars high in the heavens. Today was one of those days. I was confronted with a situation in which a friend of mine, a foreigner, made a big deal out of something very minor. As this person went on and on, ranting about stuff that they won’t remember in a couple of weeks, I was overwhelmed by the absolute beauty of the concept of ‘mai pen rai’. But this person obviously didn’t get it and wasn’t about to get it anytime soon. I have had somewhat of a checkered past (I’m a changed person now, I swear) and if I had understood this powerful concept back then I could have saved myself a lot of grief. But perhaps that’s how Karma works, forcing us to go through the same experience time and time again until we actually get it. I am still working on this. Nirvana is a long way off for me. But Thailand has changed me. Although I don’t lay claim to being Buddhist, living in a Buddhist society has also changed me. Contemplating a visit to Thailand? It could change your life, if you are open to it. It did mine so many years ago, and continues to do so today.

At Bangkoksong we won’t promise to change you. The only change we we can do is sheets and towels. We defer the rest to Karma.

Guest post by Randall

Guests Speak Out! - Jay reveals himself.

Almost all of the long-term guests at BangkokSong are invited over for a dinner at Apt A5 before they leave. Randy enjoys cooking and being guaranteed compliments from those invited.

That's the part I do not enjoy. "Wow, this is delicious!" "Absolutely amazing!" "This tastes so good." "What is your recipe?" But then, what else can a guest do?

Enjoyable Part! Conversations that ensues!

The night before, Jay talked religion! It started w/ the theory of evolution.

Randy doesn't buy the evolution theory because he can't see how it would give us a soul. To him, the idea that we are created by God is more credible. But then, he can't bring himself to believe in the latter either. He can't get over that phrase. You know, "....men who lie w/ men......."

Then, Jay said he's a Christian who prays to God every night.

Surprise of the night!

I mean, we've known him since April and never had a clue, and Jay is BEYOND gay!

He said his mom used to be a Buddhist but later converted to Catholicism during stormy times. The Virgin Madonna spoke to her twice before she decided that Buddhism was no longer her thing. But, Jay prays directly to Him.

Jay's interpretation of what He approves of and what he likes in bed is very interesting and personal. I totally respect that.

As for Randy, my man, his religion is kindness. Oh well, poor are our guests who have to sit through "the monologue."

As for me, I'm a Buddhist because I enjoy living w/ the idea that last time I did this, so this time I am this, and next time I should come back like that. I don't pray even though prayer is part of the practice too.

But I do clamor for Like A Prayer and kneel before the Like-A-Virgin Madonna.

Joe